


That's an Emo Band!

by ermamu



Category: Honkai Impact 3 (Video Game), 崩坏3rd | Honkai Impact 3rd (Video Game)
Genre: Crack, Crack Relationships, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-30
Updated: 2019-04-30
Packaged: 2020-02-10 03:48:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18652288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ermamu/pseuds/ermamu
Summary: Those newfangled hyphenated last names sometimes lead to hilarious results.





	That's an Emo Band!

Theresa just knew it was going to be a bad day somehow. Nothing seemed off at face value. Nobody was screaming, nothing was on fire, and she didn’t wake up to thirty unread texts. No, this feeling was the change in air pressure before a massive storm, the sweats before the shits.

Her day continued on without much issue. She had breakfast, took a shower, and got dressed for the day. Even with the world being more peaceful in recent years, there was still work to do. Besides if she didn’t work, she couldn’t call herself the “World’s Cutest School Principal”. 

Then she she sat down at her desk and it felt like all hell just broke loose. 

Theresa closed her eyes and reopened them, vainly hoping that the sight before her would have changed in the second she kept them closed. 

It was still there: “Theresa Young-Apocalypse”. 

Granted, Apocalypse was a pretty silly last name. However, the very most literal meaning of her full name was “loved by God, end of the word”. Cool and imposing just like her! 

“Young-Apocalypse” was not a last name, it was the name of an emo band. Probably one of the ones that had one good song and were never relevant again. 

Theresa dialed up a certain person’s number and took a deep breath. Not to calm herself, but to make sure she had enough air to effectively yell. It rang once, it rang twice, but it did not ring thrice. 

“Hello my cute-” the very certain person cheerfully began. 

Theresa quickly interrupted him,“Grandpa! What’s with our last name?!”

“Young-Apocalypse?” asked Otto.

“Yes!” Theresa shouted while slamming a hand on her desk.

She relentlessly plowed on,”Is this some sort of identity crisis? You know you’re old right? Tacking on ‘Young’ to our last name doesn’t change that!”

Theresa paused to dramatically take a large breath, but Otto took that as his cue to speak.

“You see, my cute Theresa, my husband didn’t want to take the last name ‘Apocalypse’. And I didn’t want to take the last name ‘Young’ because I am over five-hundred years old. That’s not young, I’m not young. So, we compromised and decided to simply combine the two~”

“Your...husband…” Theresa parroted. 

“Is something wrong?” Otto asked innocently.

Theresa took a deep breath, not to more effectively yell, but to calm herself. Grandpa had dated and gotten married without anybody knowing. That was important stuff!

“When did you two start dating?” Theresa resumed.

“About two years ago?” Otto replied

“When did you get married?” Theresa continued

“We just eloped yesterday, honestly I don’t see how any of this really matters. I’m still the same person as before, right?” Otto said nonchalantly. 

“GETTING MARRIED IS A PRETTY BIG DEAL!” shouted Theresa, luckily not attracting anyone’s attention. 

“Ah, sorry, sorry,” Otto said sheepishly. 

“It’s fine,” said Theresa much more calmly, “Who did you get married to?”

“Ah you know him as Walter Young,” Otto replied

Theresa suddenly hung up hoping this was all a bizarre dream. Grandpa tried to kill Walter at one point! She buried her head into her hands as she ignored her ringing phone.

**Author's Note:**

> While Walter Young and Otto is not my Otto crackship of choice, the comedy in this was a little too much to just pass up. So the total works for this ship is one angsty photo and an absolute shitpost of a story. Perfectly balanced as all things should be.


End file.
